On April 6, 2018, my dad told me that being able to marry a wife without money is your true ability. If others can marry a wife without money, then the meaning is very clear: it means you have no preparation for marriage, buying a house, a car, or bride price.

My expectation at that time was just like this; it had been the same before. My father had already been sentenced to death in my heart. To be honest, I didn't regard him as a father, and this action was merely a declaration of the death sentence, a written judgment.
So I started making money on April 6, 2018, which was during the second semester of my sophomore year. Because I was too poor, it affected my studies and my personality. At Beihang University, I didn't study well and didn't prepare for the postgraduate entrance exam. When I had 10,000 and 100,000, I would still tell my parents, but when I had 1,000,000, I didn't dare to tell them. My perspective on issues and relationships had changed. When I had five or six hundred, I felt somewhat arrogant, thinking I had achieved great success and reached the pinnacle. I did some things typical of a poor person suddenly becoming rich, but I knew I was still poor; I just comforted my mental state and treated my inner wounds. When I had over 3,000, I didn't really want to live anymore. The meaning of living was merely to seek meaning. I just wanted a little more time; while others had 24 hours a day, I wanted 48 hours. But even if I had more time, it wouldn't mean much. There's a saying that some people are alive, but they are already dead; that's me.
To live a meaningful life, what needs to be done is to go through the previous hardships again, like a journey. I have already started to implement this. I only leave myself with 30,000 yuan. This 30,000 yuan is all my living expenses, including food, clothing, housing, and transportation, as well as the principal for my entrepreneurial investment. This is everything I have to face anything. Right now, I have only 30,000 yuan; this is my lifeline. If I lose this 30,000 yuan, I will be gone. It can also prove that I am not capable of being excellent. I want to reset everything I have accumulated that can make money—my stores—all to zero, handing everything over to others to manage. I have already started this process. I will not use any of my connections or resources, just like the dual system of an Android phone. I have activated another system and set off anew, without employing any cheating methods.
When my 30,000 yuan is completely spent, and I haven't earned any money or learned anything new, it's equivalent to losing a life. At that point, I will reflect and review why I didn't succeed. Then I will take out another 30,000 yuan to start a second life.